Connection is not a nice addition to your life, it is where you do your thinking. You work out what you believe by saying it to someone and watching how it lands. Alone too long, you go slightly out of focus.
This makes you unusually good at people, and it also makes choosing hard. When two paths both have someone on them, the decision stops being about the path.
The Lovers is not really a card about romance. It is about the moment you have to pick, knowing the picking costs something. You are better at that than you give yourself credit for — you just do not enjoy it.